TABLE OF CONTENTS:

"Spiritual Guidance is not therapy, nor is it the giving of advice. Its aim is to provide assistance in both clarification and discernment. It involves sitting down on a regular basis with someone you trust in order to examine, adjust, and recommit yourself to the disciplines that give substance to your journey. It might be that your spiritual guide is someone you do not normally see, but from whom you feel you will gain wisdom. Or it might be that you find a person who is a spiritual companion to you at the same time that you are a spiritual companion to him [her]. It is incidental whether the relationship lasts a year or a lifetime. The important thing is that the relationship be one in which you are able to talk comfortably and reflectively about the unfolding process of your spiritual journey, knowing that it is in the living out of this spiritual journey that Christ is made known through you to others."
—Quoted in A Guide to Prayer for All God’s People,
from Mutual Ministry by James C. Fenhagen

My special thanks to:
o The people of The First Church of Christ in Unionville for the time to gather this material together and their willingness to use a Biblical Model for life in the church. And a special thanks to our small group participants, leaders, and coaches for their inspiration and for modeling our Small Group Lifestyle Church .
o The Rev. Matthew J. McCaffrey for proofing the text and for his guidance and support during the entire project,
o Elizabeth Richter for her helpful and insightful suggestions, &
o The Outreach Committee who made it possible for our manuals to be printed. Thank you all!

GOOD LISTENING INCLUDES:
I. Passive Listening
	A. Silence: [Showing concern with expressions and posture]
	B. Friendly Grunts: "Uh-huh," "Oh," "I see," Yeah," etc. [Showing that you are interested and tuned in!!!]
	C. Door Openers: "Go on..., yes..." "I've got time to listen if you want me to..." "You look [mention feeling state] today, what's up?" "You look worn, tired, upset, etc., would you like to tell me about it?" [All these encourage the person and lets them know you are interested.]
II. Active Listening:
	"Are you saying..." "Sounds like you're worried / feeling hurt / etc. ..." "It's like s/he didn't care about you etc....." "It looks like ..." "So you feel..." [Helps people feel that they are understood, by restating what they said in your own words!!]
III. Encouraging:
	"Where would you like to be?" "What are your goals?" "What do you need to help you accomplish your goals?"

WHERE TO START?

SEEKERS: After reading the Introduction (pp. 1-11), page 12 would be a good place to begin with a prayer partner.

• Welcome to our mentoring manual. If you are curious about the Christian Spiritual Journey and the life of faith, this process of reflecting with a Prayer Partner will give you an opportunity to share some of your journey while being able to hear about the journey of another.
  As Christians, we share a common foundation in our Lord Jesus. That foundation in Christ is built upon faith and the "Basics." The I. Basic Beliefs (p. 12+), and II. Basic Traditions (p.19+) sections, will give you a foundational background as to who we are. III. Basic Disciplines–The Spiritual Tools, will give you some tools to continue the journey. Level II – The Commands of Jesus, will prepare you to be a part of God’s great plan – move you to encourage others to join you on this journey and to use the gifts you’ve been given to help heal some of the wounds of this world.
  In summary, God has given us the Spiritual Tools to hear God’s directions, and has given us personal and spiritual gifts to bring Good News to a world filled with Bad News. It’s a wonderful feeling to be a part of God’s design and purpose for this world. We hope you will feel called by God to come join us on the journey.
  

BELIEVERS: After reading the introduction (pp. 1-11) page 25 would be a good place to start. If you have a seeker for a prayer partner, page 12 would be a good place to start.

• We are called to move from being Believers (God’s children) to God’s Disciples (students in Training with Jesus) to God’s Apostles in the World (soldiers in the Army of the Holy Spirit!).
  We have been given what we need to be a part of that spiritual army. The Spirit will provide the direction, and our gifts from God will show us our Call and Mission. (God doesn’t ask us to do something that God hasn’t already given us the resources to accomplish!)
  First, you might want to find a Prayer Partner within the church family, a fellow sister/brother believer. I’d suggest that you start with III. Basic Disciplines – The Spiritual Tools (p. 25), and then move on to Level II, The Commands of Jesus (p. 33+). This will be the quickest way for you to get to know God better and to become more aware of your gifts. Your gifts will help you to become aware of your personal call, mission, or ministry.
  Second, once you finish those 3 sections, you and your partner can then find other Prayer Partners to mentor. This would be a good time to invite someone outside of the Church Family to grow spiritually with you. I’d suggest that with this person you start with I. Basic Beliefs (p.12+) and II. Basic Traditions (p. 19+). This allows a non-threatening way for you to develop a relationship with a seeker, before dealing with those subjects that focus on deeper commitments like worship or small group participation.
  

HOW WILL MENTORING AFFECT THE LIFE OF OUR COMMUNITY

I. From Jesus in Matthew 13:3-9

3 And he told them many things in parables, saying: "Listen! A sower went out to sow. 4 And as he sowed, some seeds fell on the path, and the birds came and ate them up. 5 Other seeds fell on rocky ground, where they did not have much soil, and they sprang up quickly, since they had no depth of soil. 6 But when the sun rose, they were scorched; and since they had no root, they withered away. 7 Other seeds fell among thorns, and the thorns grew up and choked them. 8 Other seeds fell on good soil and brought forth grain, some a hundred fold, some sixty, some thirty. 9 Let anyone with ears listen!" (NRSV)
Mentoring is like seeds falling on good soil. It brings forth grain!

II. From James A. Forbes, Jr. in Living with Apocalypse

"The gospel calls us to count up the cost of our witness. Part of this process is the assessing of our power as well. In God’s grace the Church discovers that its members are not helpless victims of alien powers but bearers of gifts, competencies, and influence for effecting change. Just as Moses was told to use the rod in his hand and the disciples were bidden to feed the multitude with the lunch they had, so we are expected to use what we have. One of the functions of the Church is to help its members discover and release their power in ways that promote the cause of the Kingdom. [my emphasis] Professionals and nonprofessionals, trained and untrained workers, rich and poor – all are influencing their context either by reinforcing the status quo or promoting change. The issue is not simply one of getting power but of becoming aware of how we use the power we have, and then developing expertise to make an impact on our communities for good. The Church is the sleeping giant. What a powerful witness we could be if the parts of the body came to a new awareness of the power that is at work within and around us!" (Quoted in A Guide to Prayer for All God’s People, p. 232-233.)

III. From Loren Mead in Transforming Congregations for the Future

"A basic theme of this book is that the ability to ‘see’ bad news relates to our discipleship. The willingness to ‘do something’ about it relates to our apostleship." p. 36
"I sometimes say that every pain in the world has a special kind of Velcro on it, and that each of us has grown a patch of our own special brand, also. We can bump into all sorts of pain out there, but we do not respond until there is a match. Then we have no option. We are seized by the pain that matches our call, and we must act." p. 37
"A congregation’s task is to help us to know and claim the power we have, commit ourselves to engage the pain of the world, and then to manage the process by which we are transformed from passive onlookers to sent people—apostles. Our congregations are there to help each of us grasp and be grasped by the good news that God has uniquely for each of us, and then to empower us to go out as sent people—apostles-—to the pain of the world as bearers of our own special version of the good news." p. 41

Spiritual Development of a Growing Christian Disciple
Love God:
	First Base: Seekers and Believing Public --- "Relationship with God/Jesus/HS Focus"
	Baptize / Faith: Believe, Acknowledge, Invite Within, Follow
	Second Base: Believer --- "Listening to God - Prayer Focus"
	Teach / Spiritual Tools
Love Neighbor:
	Third Base: Disciple --- "Invitational Focus" Baptize / Invite Others
	Home Plate: Apostle --- "Gifts and Mission Focus" Teach / Respond to one's call
Definitions:
1. Seeker:	Seeker: Unaware of God's love for them and Unaware of their purpose in God's plans. Believing Public: Believe God exists but probably unaware of God's love or their purpose
2. Believer:	Church member who attends worship or Small Group or both. Aware of god's love, purpose maybe. Begins to learn how to Listen to God's guidance through Listening Prayer
3. Disciple:	Intentional (systematic) about Growing Spiritually - learning to be Invitational and to mentor others
4. Apostle:	Mentoring others, and using their Gifts in the world where God calls them. Those using their gifts to bring Good News to a Bad News situation.

SCRIPTURAL FOCUS:

---

Discipleship goals:

Here is a visual way of viewing the Discipling Process:

1. Find a Prayer Partner to "mentor" with you

2. Get "more" connected to God in the process

3. Develop an Invitational Spirit, and

4. Realize and "apply" you god given Gifts to a hurt in the world,

thenyou have become an apostle! Congratulations!

To Accomplish Our goals: What Needs to Happen?
	1. Mentoring Another in Discipleship See page 52
	2. Listening to God during the week Using The Spiritual Tools, see pages 25-32
	3. Be Invitational to others See pages 33 - 39
	4. Realize your Gifts and respond to your Call See pages 40 - 49